Special Olympics

Last Monday night saw the mighty Narwhals take on London Orcas in a battle of the Arctic Whales. Narwhals entered the fray horns up and ready to go, but the Orcas certainly put up more resistance than was expected.

May 21st Stats

Following a few training sessions with tictactical masterclasses from Woody, Narwhals certainly went in feeling confident that their homework would be rewarded with a sublime performance of tactical nuance. Fired up by a Westfield Nandos, the team even took to the pitch early and were warming up way before the start time. This caused panic and confusion in Poobacker’s mind as he saw the team already in the pool waiting to go while he was walking to the changing rooms. The pressure took its toll and no Pre-match Deposits were forthcoming which certainly did not improve that individual’s performance.

Narwhals raced into an early 5-0 lead buoyed on by our Ginger Ninja and 20/20 vision Winehands and all was looking well. However, it would appear that Woody’s reminder at the end of the first quarter that we should remember the tactics discussed over the last few weeks had the opposite effect. Bamboozled by too many thoughts of picks, drives, man-ups and other unrealistic plays inside heads that are generally somewhat lacking in matter, the Narwhals floundered and laboriously added to their lead – winning Q2 3-2, Q3 3-2 and the final quarter 4-3 to give an overall victory of 15-7. Ginge and Winehands both netted 5 apiece, with honourable mentions to Woody, Finch, Gamble and Floater. Spectacular failures on the man-ups were a particular highlight, with Floater standing out with an exceptional lob-pass to the opposition keeper.

An exquisite performance from Punchy Holah saw him managing to take home 75% of the total Narwhal’s majors for himself, and enabled him to get first pickings of what shower to use in the changing rooms. Spectacular stuff from a key Catas contender.

There were several notable high and low lights which deserve special attention in an otherwise somewhat routine victory:


  • Hotly contested this one between Woody, Dan and a.n.other who managed to miss a 3 on 0 situation in a comedy of errors, and our very own octogenarian Gary who performed a sensational lob straight into the keeper’s hands. Woody and Dan just nudged this one however


  • Close between Winehands and Ginge, with the later just sneaking it to the coveted prize


  • Sadly Weeble won this with his last quarter goal, however, this should be taken with a pinch of salt (See below)

Holiday update:

It was looking like a 3 man trip out to the Algarve this week, with a father/son Finch combo being joined by the destroyer of rings, however, due to a flurry of last quarter activity, the cancelation fees were activated for both Finch Senior and Weeble, leaving Finch junior out on a solo trip to this fascinating corner of Europe. Whoever passed to Weeble in the last quarter should sit down and have a think about what they have just done.

Until next time – Forza Narwhali!