The Mysterious Case of the missing Child… (and terrible reffing)

For our first game of 2016, the Mighty Narwhals trekked up to the North London black hole that is Stoke Newington for a game against Poly Purple. Stats below:

Jan 20th Stats

Following a less than enjoyable tangle with public transport and an exceptionally cheeky pre-game nandos, Shute, Bowen, Holah and myself arrived early at the pool to be faced by a small scale evacuation and two police vans. Thinking that his viciousness in the pool had finally caught up with him, “Punchy” Holah nearly did a runner – but the police weren’t there for him – a child had gone missing – insert your own jokes here… (luckily it was later found!!)

The kid was not the only person to go missing as during the game we noticed the referee disappearing, only to reappear to send a confused Narwhal from the pool. By the end of the game, we were 13 majors up compared to Poly’s 1… Kudos to John Holah for flying in the face of Mrs. Holah and making an early bid to keep the Catas Trophy. That being said, Nick “grabby” Shute is pushing him close, collecting 3 majors himself!! In other news, Phil got mugged by a 12yr old, Dan Bedford made a triumphant return from Glasgow (before probably heading back there next week) and Chris Mann became the only player not to be majored!!

Man of the match was awarded to me for being awesome, Moment of the Match was combined between myself and Bedford for the three goals we assisted/scored with each/for each other and Fluffer was awarded to Nick for having a bit of a shocker (by his own admission).

Stats wise, Nick sits at the top (as expected) on goals but is also challenging John Holah to be the most brutal of them all. Could this be the year Nick takes both special awards? Bedford picked up 3 goals so moves into the Champions League spot – we still await the triumphant return of Luke “rashy” Penfold, SpongeRob ¬†PooPants, Tim “exams hermit” Young and Tom “networking prick” Walklate.

And now, the Maddy Club…

Chris Mann