Please send me out, I really need a rest…

This weeks report takes us to the battle of Croydon, where the well behaved Narwhals went down 9-8 to an unusually aggressive and mouthy Amphibs team. In parts we played well, winning the third 3-0, but again going down in the 3rd quarter. Our man down defense was shaky, despite the delightful tactical video we have done for you but that being said, there was a lot of good work being done.
Special mention must go to John Holah who managed to record his first 3 major game this year, now only 1 major behind in the Catas-Trophy. Despite the rest of us trying really, really hard to get a major, John seemed to be picking them up for fun. A third major in the 3rd quarter almost secured the Fluffer award for him – however this week it is unanimously awarded to the Sheikh who’s passing was, in all honesty, awful. Man of the Match goes to Mr. Finch for some good saves and for again securing himself a major – most brutal Keeper in Croydon… Moment of the match is awarded to our new boy Tadija for a superb lob that sent the keeper the wrong way. He will tell you he meant it…
In other news, Croydon had an argument with the referee’s and it seemed that for most of the 4th quarter we were just having a free swim. I think however that it was a cunning ploy, much like the “injury break” in tennis, to disrupt our rhythm. A formal investigation is being launched.
In the stats, Nick stays at the top on goals, Chapman has basically died but promises to return in July and John and I have powered away from the field in the major king stakes. Tim’s turn of form in May and June has slowed, picking up a 2nd maddy in 2 games whilst Phil continues to be the top fluffer!!
Until next time Gents!!
Forza Narwhali!! (Volo ego eram aptus)